Working in the funeral industry taught me early how important it is to care for myself first. Funeral work is beautiful, sacred, and deeply rewarding, but it also asks a lot of the heart. My role is to hold space for someone when they cannot do it themselves.
Over the years, I have learnt that if I do not ground myself properly, I can carry home the grief and emotions of the families I serve.
Because of this, I have developed daily practices, especially before meeting a family or writing a service. They help me step into the right space, listen with my heart, stay present, and honour the person whose story I have been trusted to tell.
My business name, SoulCrystalEarth, reflects my love of crystals and my passion for helping souls transition from Earth to beyond. It reminds me to work with soul, spirit, grounding, and love.
When I write, I listen to meditation music. It helps me focus on the person whose service I am creating. I never want a funeral script to feel like words on a page. I want it to feel like a life remembered with honesty, warmth, and laughter where it belongs.
I also use candles. As part of my ritual, I light a candle and ask for support in tuning in to the deceased and their story. That small flame helps me pause and remember that every life is sacred and every farewell deserves care.
I gift memorial candles to the families I serve. For me, lighting a candle is like sending a prayer into the Universe. I add crystals to support loved ones through grief, offering something gentle to hold onto when words are not enough.
On the day of a funeral service, I meditate before leaving home, and I never leave without my crystals — usually stuffed in my bra, one or two, sometimes three. It may make people smile, but it is very much part of who I am and how I prepare myself.
More often than not, Hematite comes with me, along with whatever crystal I feel drawn to on the day. Amethyst is always close too, either as jewellery or tucked safely in my bra near my heart.
Both Amethyst and Hematite help raise consciousness and support higher alignment. Hematite also helps dispel negative energy, keeping me grounded and protected. They are not just pretty stones; they are part of my self-care, protection, and connection.
I am passionate about telling people’s stories, I prefer to meet families face to face. This creates a personal connection and helps stories unfold naturally. There are tears, and laughter. Those moments helps me understand the person beyond the dates and details.
When I am not writing a funeral script or spending time with my husband, family, and friends, I love to write. Writing helps me make sense of life, love, loss, and everything in between. I am currently working on my third children’s book, part of a series inspired by our family pets.
My first published book was a memoir about my funeral journey, including guidance on what is required when someone dies. It came from my own experiences and desire to make a difficult time a little less frightening for others.
I believe everyone has a story to tell. Some are loud and colourful, some are quiet and simple, and some are held gently in the hearts of those who loved us. My wish is that we share our stories and leave them as gifts for others.
I will not leave this world without writing my story. Will you?
About Rita-Marie
Rita-Marie Lenton’s path to becoming a Funeral Celebrant began on Christmas Eve in 1996, after experiencing what she calls “the funeral from hell” — her own mother’s service. From that painful day grew a heartfelt wish to understand the funeral process and help other families feel supported, heard, and cared for. With over 26 years in the funeral industry, including work as a funeral director, arranger, assistant, and crematorium manager, Rita-Marie brings both experience and deep compassion to every ceremony.
Over the last five years as Funeral Celebrant, she creates warm, meaningful farewells that honour each life, legacy, and family story.
PHOTO (right/below)
Rita-Marie is an incredible supporter of our Ladies Who Long Lunch, especially to Kirsty and Jo. We are grateful for her support and for always bringing a sense of calm to a room.
This photo is from our Scarborough Long Lunch event. “Kirsty Fields, Rita-Marie and Jo Stevens”
Be sure to follow Rita-Marie on her socials to learn more and stay connected.
Rita-Marie’s article “What I Carry With Me” was originally printed in Issue 11 of The Lunch Mag.
To get in touch or Follow Rita-Marie on Social Media:
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